Falling to Pieces
by Merle's Sugartits
Summary: Takes place six years after 'I Love Looney' ended. No zombies this time. Lucy's struggled now and then to keep a grip on reality, but after Norah has an accident at the park, she can barely keep it together. (Rated M for possible smut (not planning to at the moment) and Trigger Warning: suicide/cutting, I'll let you know before it comes up.)
1. I'm Somewhere in Between

**Runaway-zebra: It will not be a one shot, because cliff hangers…**

**Klreyes91: Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed that last one.**

_Author's Note: The song "Falling to Pieces" by Faith No More inspired this. I highly suggest listening to it. Also, usual disclaimer: I only own the plot, Lucy, Chanel and Norah (and Liz has permission to use them.)_

Lucy sat on the park bench next to Chanel, and they watched Norah play. "So have you thought about a name for him yet?" Lucy asked, turning to face her best friend turned sister-in-law.

"We're not really sure yet," Chanel replied, placing her hand on her growing belly. "I like Noah, but Daryl's not really sure about it. Says it's too much like Norah…"

"It's cute," Lucy smiled.

Chanel nodded, "Yeah…he really likes Archer though."

Lucy's eyebrows arched and she smiled, "I think that might actually be kind of perfect."

"Yeah?" Chanel turned to her.

Lucy nodded. Before she could say anything else though, Norah came running over to them, "Mommy, mommy, I fell!"

"I'm sorry, sweetie, let me see," She took Norah's hands and pulled her closer. Norah tilted her chin up so Lucy could see the scrape. Lucy frowned.

"It hurts," Norah cried.

"I know, sweetie."

"Can we go home? I wanna see daddy."

"Daddy's not home yet."

"I want daddy!" Tears started to roll down Norah's cheeks.

Lucy sighed and Chanel chuckled, "I never thought I'd hear someone say they _want_ Merle." Lucy rolled her eyes. Both women stood and Lucy picked Norah up. Norah tucked her face into Lucy's shoulder and Lucy carried her to the car. They said their goodbyes and Norah gave Chanel a small wave.

When Lucy got home, Norah impatiently ran inside, anxious for Merle to get there. Lucy sighed and walked into the bathroom, getting out a bandage and the tube of Neosporin so she could doctor Norah's scrape. "Norah! C'mere, sweetie."

Norah came running into the bathroom, "What is it mommy?" Lucy turned to her and frowned. She knelt down in front of the six-year old and touched her chin. The skin was soft to the touch, scar free. "Is something wrong mommy?"

Lucy shook her head, "No, sweetie, everything's fine." She smeared Neosporin onto Norah's chin and covered it with the bandage. "Go play, sweetie, daddy will be home soon."

Norah nodded and left the bathroom. Lucy could hear her footsteps as she skipped down the hall to her bedroom. Lucy stood and washed her hands before looking into the mirror. She gripped the countertop tightly, "This is real," she muttered. "It's real."

She opened the medicine cabinet and got out her pills. She didn't need to take them as often as she once had. Merle and Norah kept her grounded. She swallowed two pills dry and took another deep breath, repeating her mantra again. Lucy went downstairs into the kitchen to start cooking dinner, knowing Merle would be on his way home any minute.

When Merle got home, Lucy heard the "Daddy!" shouts as Norah ran up to him.

He picked her up, "What happened to your chin, babydoll?"

"I fell of the monkey bars at the park."

"You okay now?" Lucy heard silence as Norah nodded. Merle walked into the kitchen, carrying their daughter, "Smells good, sugarplum," he said as Lucy took the baked chicken out of the oven.

She placed the pan on the stove top and turned to face him, smiling, "Thank you." He walked over and kissed her cheek.

After dinner, Norah rook her bath and Merle tucked her into bed. He walked into the bedroom where Lucy was sitting, reading a book. Merle stripped down, getting ready to get into bed beside her. He glanced over at Lucy, "Everything okay, sugarplum?"

She glanced up from her book and gave him a curt nod, "Mm hmm."

"Ya sure? All day you've been lookin' like somethin's wrong. Is somethin' botherin' ya?"

Lucy marked the place in her book, "It's just…" she sighed heavily before continuing. "It's silly; really, I know I was just imagining things, but…"

Merle sat down next to her, pulling her against him, he slipped his arms around her. His thumb rubbed the bare skin exposed by her tank top. "Tell me," he gently prodded.

She sighed again, "When I went to put the Band-Aid on Norah's chin, it looked as if her skin had already healed."

Merle kissed her cheek, "But you bandaged it anyways."

Lucy nodded and turned to look at him, her head tilted slightly so their eyes met. "This is real."

He nodded too, "Yes, sugarplum, it's real." She leaned her head onto his shoulder and slipped her arms around his waist. His arms tightened some around her, and they sat there like that for a few minutes in silence. Finally, Merle yawned, "We need to get some sleep, at least I do…"

She nodded and he got up to turn the light off while she settled into the mattress, getting comfortable. He got into bed, crawling under the blankets beside her. Merle pulled Lucy into his arms again. She smiled contently and leaned back against his chest.

Lucy had trouble sleeping, she kept thinking of Norah's chin. Her hallucination had seemed so real; it looked and felt so real. She carefully broke free from Merle's embrace and got out of bed, not wanting to wake him, and got out of bed, not wanting to wake him up. Quietly, she left the room and crept down the hall to Norah's room.

She slipped inside Daryl's former bedroom and walked over to Norah's bed. The small lamp on her bedside table cast a soft pink glow in that corner of the room, and Norah slept peacefully. Lucy leaned over her sleeping daughter, and attempted to see underneath the bandage, carefully prying it back in the middle.

It was still too dark to see whether or not the skin underneath was marred and Lucy frowned. The only way to know would be to take the Band-Aid off, and she couldn't do that without waking Norah up.

When Lucy got to the door, she heard Norah's voice behind her, "Is something wrong, mommy?"

Lucy turned back around. Norah was propped up on one elbow, and she rubbed her eyes sleepily. Lucy smiled, speaking softly, "Everything's fine, sweetie."

"What were you doing?"

Lucy gave a slight shrug, hesitating while she thought of an excuse. "I thought I heard something. I was just checking to see if you were still asleep." Lucy smiled, "Go back to sleep, I'll see you in the morning."

Norah settled against her pillow again, "Goodnight mommy."

"Good night Norah, sweet dreams."

Lucy crept back into her bedroom, easing into bed beside Merle. "Where'd ya go?" he asked as his arm slipped back around her. Sleep coated his voice.

"I needed to use the bathroom."

She settled back into his arms and let sleep overtake her.


	2. My Love and My Agony

**Klreyes91: My lips are sealed.**

**Runaway-zebra: Not that much, she's only six. And Lucy's a nut job, there's no telling what to expect.**

_Author's Note: self-harm in this chapter._

When morning came, Lucy made breakfast while Merle got ready for work, and Norah continued sleeping. After they ate, Lucy cleared the table so she could begin washing dishes, and Merle left. Norah went back upstairs to get ready for school. A few minutes later, Norah came running downstairs, "Mommy! Mommy!"

Lucy turned around, "What is it?"

"My band-aid is falling off, look." She frowned; it had started to peel back.

"It's okay, we can put on a new one," Lucy gave her a small smile and turned the water off before heading out of the room to go upstairs to the bathroom. Norah followed after her.

Lucy opened the medicine cabinet and got out a new bandage. She finished peeling off the old one, and her eyes widened. "What is it, mommy?" Norah asked.

Lucy shook her head slightly, "It's nothing."

Norah turned towards the mirror, "Look, mommy, it's healed already."

Lucy smiled weakly, "That's because of the medicine in the Neosporin. Go finish getting ready for school now, you don't want to miss the bus."

Norah frowned, "Are you okay, mommy?"

Lucy nodded, "Perfectly fine. Go on, now."

Norah turned and left, heading down the hall to her room. Lucy steadied herself against the counter. How could that have happened? It just didn't make any sense to her. She started to open the medicine cabinet again, and frowned. Deciding against it, she closed it back. She wasn't hallucinating. Norah had seen it too, that, or she was just as crazy as her. Even then, they wouldn't have the same hallucinations, right?

Lucy headed downstairs, going back into the kitchen to finish cleaning up. She saw Norah off to school and settled down on to the couch to watch some TV. _It's happening again,_ she thought, _I'm losing my mind again. I'm gonna end up back in Green Meadows. _She sighed heavily, unable to rid herself of the thoughts in her head. _It was just the Neosporin,_ she tried to convince herself.

A couple of hours passed, and Lucy was still thinking about what had occurred with Norah. Finally, a thought struck her. She picked up the phone and called Chanel. Chanel picked up almost immediately, and Lucy asked, "Are you busy today?"

"No, I'm not doing anything." Chanel could hear the anxiety in Lucy's voice. "Is everything okay?"

Lucy sighed and rubbed her temple, "I…I'm not really sure. I just really need to talk to somebody."

"You want me to come over?"

"Please, if you don't mind."

"Of course I don't, I'll be there in a few."

As soon as Chanel got there and Lucy let her in, she asked, "So what's botherin' ya?"

Lucy sighed and gestured to the couch, silently telling her to have a seat. Chanel sat and Lucy asked, "You want somethin' to drink?"

Chanel shook her head, "Just tell me what's wrong."

Lucy sat down next to her and sighed again before asking, "When I was locked away…why didn't you come visit me?" She frowned, staring down at the floor.

"I…I was on vacation."

"I was institutionalized for almost two years."

"It wasn't that long."

Lucy frowned again, looking up at Chanel, giving her a narrow-eyed look, her brow was furrowed.

Chanel sighed, "When I came back, they told me you still weren't responding to anyone, so I didn't think there was any point in going…I'm sorry…"

Lucy's frown deepened.

"What's this about, anyways?"

"Norah's chin has already healed, and she knows it's healed, so I know I'm not imagining it, unless she's-"

"Lucy…"

"Don't," she cut her friend off, stopping her from saying anything. That's when the idea hit her. She couldn't figure out why she had never thought about doing it before. She got up off of the couch, and started towards the kitchen. Chanel pushed herself up and followed after her as quickly as she could manage. "Lucy, what are you thinkin'?"

She watched as Lucy made her way over to the silverware drawer. She pulled out one of the steak knives.

Chanel's eyes widened, "Lucy, whatever it is you're planning on doing, please don't. Just stop, think about it."

Lucy held her arm out, wrist turned up.

"Lucy! Don't!"

She pressed the blade against her skin.

"Don't! Think about Norah! And Merle! They need you. Lucy, we can call Merle, he can come home, and…" she stopped once the blade cut through Lucy's skin. Blood trickled down from the cut and Chanel screamed her name, digging her phone out, she called Merle at work, watching as the blood trickled down Lucy's hand, dripping off her fingertips onto the counter.

The phone was answered on the second ring, "JJ's Mechanics, this is Merle," his voice filled the receiver and Chanel could barely form a sentence.

"Lucy slit her wrist!"

"What?" Merle was stunned.

"She's lost it!"

Lucy dropped the knife, looking down at her bleeding arm.


	3. My Life is Falling to Pieces

**Runaway-zebra: She's not a superhuman. Maybe. I'll never tell. Also, I'm terribly sorry I've made you wait this long; I know it's not like me.**

_Author's Note: Lucy has a face now. You can go bother her at: .com_

Merle dropped the phone, yelling that he had a family emergency as he grabbed his keys and ran out the door. He couldn't get home fast enough. The whole time thoughts of Lucy dying and him not being there played in his head. What would he do? What would he tell Norah? He finally pulled into the driveway and barely managed to put down the kickstand of his motorcycle due to his frantic state of mind.

He threw open the front door, "Lucy!" His voice cracked on the second syllable, revealing the fear and pain he felt.

"In here!" Chanel shouted from the kitchen.

He barely managed to maneuver around the furniture without bumping into or tripping over any of it as he made his way into the other room. Lucy was sitting on the floor, her back against the counter. Blood coated her arm from the still bleeding gash on her wrist. Chanel was kneeling beside her, pressing paper towels to the wound. "Lucy…" He walked over to her and knelt down next to Chanel.

Lucy was already starting to look pale. He reached over, taking her bloody hand in his. Chanel moved the paper towels out of the way so he could examine the cut, "What were you thinkin' sugarplum?" he asked quietly.

"I…her chin…I…it…" she was rambling incoherently. With his other hand, Merle stroked her hair.

He turned to Chanel, "She's gonna need stitches."

Chanel nodded in agreement, "You take her to the hospital, I'll pick Norah up from school and let Daryl know what happened."

Merle nodded. He stood and pulled Lucy to her feet with him.

"We'll keep Norah tonight," Chanel added. "You and Lucy need some time alone."

Merle nodded again, giving her as much of a smile as he could manage, "Her suitcase is in her closet, ya can pack her some clothes and stuff."

This time, it was Chanel's turn to nod. Merle put Lucy into her old BMW, and he drove to the hospital. While she was getting stitched up, they told him they wanted to keep her overnight for observation. It was protocol for suicide attempts. Even though that hadn't exactly been the case, Merle didn't argue. Merle knew Lucy wasn't suicidal. Sure, she slipped every now and then, but she hadn't tried to hurt herself before. Even after Norah was born, Lucy had suffered from postpartum depression, but it had never gotten that bad.

Merle sat at Lucy's bedside, picking at the food they had brought her. She had refused to eat it, saying it was nasty, and that the green beans she didn't even bother to taste were waxy. He sat the fork down and turned to her, "Lucy…"

"Please, Merle, I don't…"

"Why?" he cut her off. "Why did you do it? What were you thinkin'? Please tell me. Make me understand."

"I…" she shook her head, "I don't know…her chin…Norah's chin…" He reached over and grabbed her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. Lucy's eyes met his, "Her chin healed so fast…I thought maybe…Maybe I hadn't imagined everything."

He sighed and looked down; she didn't need to elaborate for him to know what she was talking about.

"I…I'm sorry…it was silly…I was being stupid."

He gave her a curt nod, "Yeah. For starters, I got two hands. That alone should'a been enough."

She sighed, looking away from him, "I wasn't thinking."

He sighed again, "It's okay, you're okay."

There was a knock on the door; they turned their attention to it as it was pushed open. Marissa appeared, smiling. She kept her voice soft and Lucy met her smile with a small one of her own, "Hey, Chanel told me what happened. I wanted to make sure you were okay."

Lucy nodded, "I'm fine. How's Norah?"

Marissa shrugged slightly, "Good. She's happy about getting to spend the night with Chanel and Daryl. They didn't tell her you're here."

Lucy's smile widened slightly, "That's good." Staring at Marissa, Lucy felt even worse. The girl in front of her was reason enough to prove that everything was normal. Merle's thumb brushed across the skin of her hand and Lucy looked at him. He smiled at her, and she returned the smile.


End file.
